Sip When He Says Hope

What's more fun than watching an inspirational speaker deliver soaring oratory as he historically accepts his party's nomination?

Doing so with drink in hand, of course.

So sip if he says "hope" -- really when he says it -- and enjoy the other rules below to share a celebratory toast as you drink liberally tonight.

Take a Sip when
He Says:
- hope
- change
- community organizer
- Bush
- Hillary Clinton
or when:
- he says how much he loves America
- he tells a joke that actually makes you laugh
- he implicitly/explicitly compares himself to MLK
- compliments Michelle for being accomplished

Take a Gulp when:
He Says:
- Yes we can
- Iraq
- Kansas
- Cheney
- Bill Clinton
or when:
- he quotes a great American text or speech
- he talks about Joe Biden's lovely family
- he compares himself to JFK
- he compliments Michelle for being a good wife and mother

Take a Big Gulp when:
He Says:
- audacity
- glass ceiling
- bipartisan
- Rove
- swiftboat
or when:
- he quotes the Bible
- he uses the word "partisan" like it's a bad thing
- compliments a Republican (or Joe Lieberman)
- he compares himself to RFK

Chug when:
- he gratuitously compliments McCain's "service" and "courage"
- he jokes about John McCain's houses

Celebratory Toast if:
- he uses the word "partisan" like it's a good thing
- challenges McCain to a duel
- praises President Jimmy Carter
- he makes you cry

Finish Your Drink if:
- He mentions Reverend Jeremiah Wright
- He calls for Bush’s impeachment
- He threatens to bomb Iran.

(If you want to print out a version, you can click on the attachment link for the PDF below -- prints 2 per page)